Andy: Did he have a foreskin?

Sian till Golide: Why don't you like hot drinks? You just don't like warm stuff in your mouth?

Steve till en polare om en liten weird gummi leksak formad som ett konstigt monster: If you dunk it in there (min whiskey/cola), I'll suck its head. (Han gjorde det också).

Jag (om heart of darkness): it was painful.
Ed: What? Painful as in brilliant?

Kay/Kim had skrivit på en lapp att Steve luktade fisk.
Jag: There's worse things to smell like mate!
Steve: I do NOT smell like a fish!!

Steve: When are you gonna suck my balls through a straw?
Jag: Are they that small?

Steve: I've got a pocket twister.
Ben: A POCKET twister?! How small do you have to be?!?!

Steve: What are you wearing? What would you mother say?!
Kat (looking at Steve with disgust): She'd say: 'who are you hanging out with?!

Me "Ellie, did you just throw up a bit in your mouth?"

Me: If this psych thing doesn't work out, we could always move to Japan and sell our dirty knickers.

Kat: You may have the swine flu.
Steve: Wait, did you just call me a pig?
Kat: No, that would very much be a compliment.

In taxi.
Sian (in backseat): Where's that draft coming from?
Jenny (middle seat): my bad!

Me: I might vomit all over you in a minute
Ben: no you won't cus I'll punch you in the face

Ben: Me and Dave were walking back to Langstone from Liquid once, and we got totally lost. So we bumped into to these people who were like: "Do you know where we are?" And we were like: "Do you know where WE are?!"

Adam: How did the presentation go?
Me: Very well thank you!
Ellie: What the hell did you guys talk about?
Adam: My MASSIVE cock!
Steve (to me): "You lied! There's not toilet there, I had to piss in the sink!"

Outside pizza place, someone turns the light off and on again.
Steve: "Oh! That's not cool! Some of us are drunk!"

Boys talking about Adam's future Nirvana-wedding.
Joe: "On the inventation it will say: Come as you are"
Andy: "but if you can't - Nevermind"

I'm on the phone with my mother.
Steve: "ask her if she's had a divorce yet?"
Me: "Steve wants to know if you will divorce dad..:"
Mum: "tell him I need to see him first before I decide"

Emma: "VA?! tar ni 0,2?! Jag tar ju 0.20!!!"

Nirosha: När jag var i Indien upptäckte jag plötsligt att mina händer var gula, så jag trodde att jag kanske hade gulsot.
Jag: "men så upptäckte du att det bara var curry."

Zola: "Steve would have sex with anything."
Me: "Yeah, he'd have sex with a hedgehog if you gave him a fiver. "
Zola: "He'd do it for free! You'd have to pay the hedgehog a fiver!"

Amy (on train): What food group do eggs belong to?
Me: I don't know.... Do we sound stupid now?
Amy: Nah, I think we made everyone think.

Amy, about old woman on train: "The things I'd do to her. There would be blood and crap everywhere."

Me, looking at a picture of me and Ellie: "Ew, I look terrible in that picture."
Ellie: "yeah, my arm looks a bit big."

Amy: "It's not stalking if you're just making sure they get home alright."

Amy: "I will sleep with her. just not yet."

Me, to Silvia "It doesn't really matter what you thought, as you were wrong."

Me: "Don't tickle me cus I might fart."

Tess: "I hate kids."
Amy: "Did you just say you hate rabbits?!?!"
Tess: "no, kids."
Amy: "oh."

Ellie: "if the bus doesn't show up now, I'm gonna throw myself in that river."
Me: "Ellie, that's the sea."

Amy: "I love Nick Griffin... Let's get married and have babies. With his strange eye, and my amazing hair they'd take over the world!"

Nico: "You know I'm not a nazi, I just like the upsetting factor."

Amy and me sitting in my room, there's loads of ice and snow outside. We suddenly hear a shovel hit the ice hard several times.
Amy: "It's Sian digging herself a grave."

Ellie putting up chocolate egg in her nose.
Me: "Why are you putting it up your nose?!"
Ellie: "Cus I don't wanna eat it yet!"

Amy: "I wonder if I could knock a child out with one of my breasts..."

Ellie to Steve: "you make me gag in my sleep."

Kay to Steve: "Your brain must be massive!"
Stevie: "No, it's actually tiny!"
Me: "You're thinking of a different head Steve..."
Steve showing off a wank movement.
Me: "That does nothing to me Steve."
Steve: "Does nothing for the guys you do it to either."

Grace: "Do you ever get an itchy eyebrow?"
Amy: "Not enough to bring up in conversation."

Henry: "As I joke, I'm going to run out in the garden naked, hide in the shed until a neighbour comes out and chase them around naked."
Amy: "Henry, that's not a joke. That's just a horrific event."

Steve: "I'm going to fuck you."
Amy: "Only if I can fuck your mum first."
Steve: "Sure, lets do it!"
Amy: "We gotta wait until Tuesday because your mum comes off her period then."


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